I'm Afraid of Needles...

A few weeks ago I wrote about needing to schedule my mammogram. This turned out to be a little more complicated than I expected. Apparently a mammogram requires a referral in the military system from your primary doctor. Ironically just prior to trying to schedule mine, I had just received a postcard from the military hospital informing me that I was behind in getting both my annual Pap Smear and Mammogram and instructing me to schedule them. It seemed logical to me that the postcard was the only referral I should need. I explained this to the appointment clerk, but needless to say, she did not agree with my assessment of the situation, and I was first required to schedule a physical in order to get the needed OK from my doctor to schedule my Mammogram.

My Tattoo

The appointment did result in the desired referral, but apparently the doctor also felt I needed to have a myriad of other routine blood tests in addition to the Mammogram. My stomach tightened when I heard this. I hated anything to do with needles. I nearly passed out when I had my ears pierced. I had to take a friend with me to hold my hand while I got my belly button pierced, and when I had the great idea that I would conquer my fear of needles by getting a small tattoo on my back, I had to stop halfway through. The only reason I don't have half a heart on my back today is the tattoo artist was kind enough to run next store to get me a Pink grapefruit juice to drink. He explained that my fear response had probably lowered my blood sugar, and it just needed a boost.  Once I drank the juice, I was able to get through the rest of the tattoo. This didn't prove to fix the overarching problem though, the next time I had to get my blood drawn, I still needed to lay down to get through the test.

So when the doctor mentioned the blood work, I secretly thought to myself. "This is why they make you see the Doctor first. They have to trap you into getting your yearly blood work done at the same time! Damn that appointment clerk for not seeing it my way!" The ideal situation would have been for me to immediately run over and have my lab work completed right away, so I couldn't get too anxious about it, but the cholesterol test required fasting, and I had already eaten that day. I would have to come back the next day. But the next morning I woke up and found a reason not to go. This continued for almost two weeks until yesterday morning. In the throws of my guilt session from the previous night I realized the one thing I truly needed to feel guilty about was not getting my blood tests completed. Part of staying healthy meant staying ahead of any problems, and the lab work was still waiting. It was time for this baby to get her act together and face the needle.

So I confronted my demon yesterday. I trekked to the local clinic and gave four tubes of blood. The tech was so good I didn't even have to lie down afterwards. I expect this will be a demon with multiple lives, which I will always struggle to conquer it, but maybe one of my pay offs for this journey will end with far fewer needles in my future. Once a year would be just fine!